Thursday, October 29, 2009

Many a star must have been there for you so you might feel it...

- i am taking samples of light as it passes through a glass orb filled with water
- i am covering them with lacquer
- i am applying paint to mimic the lines of light passing through the surface of water, as seen underwater
- i am covering them with polyurethane and then repeating the last two processes to create a physically create depth
- using white paper and using paint to create abrasions
- i am then covering them with wood finish
- my interest in skin and light has brought me to the exploration of photodermatitis

Thoughts in the Studio:
I often question my artistic practice, and question the work I am doing, I question why I am doing art and not something else, I doubt myself and that anyone understands what I am trying to do, I think that what i am doing is contrived and just a sad simulation of a simulacra, I think about everything everyone has ever said (negative) about what I am doing and believe it, and when I feel like all i do is add tic marks under "Not good enough", i remember that for some reason i am still here and there has to be an all encompassing reason for my existence and what i am doing... or else i wouldn't be ... why do i invest so much in contingencies?

I want to come up with the equation that will effectively, efficiently, and successfully, solve the problem of the plight of existence. I hope to further explore porphyria cutanea tarda (a skin disease characterized by blistering of the skin in areas that receive higher levels of exposure to sunlight) ... and perhaps even the mythology and mysticism that has been entangled into this affliction... i think that i am interested in these subgroups of unique individuals that are estranged from whole populations and ultimately tortured or killed... and then maybe delve in the reversal....

Celtic Druidism // druids = philosophers and theologians
Diodorus Siculus -Greek historian who wrote Bibliotheca historica - remarks upon the importance of prophets in druidic ritual:
 "These men predict the future by observing the flight and calls of birds and by the sacrifice of holy animals: all orders of society are in their power... and in very important matters they prepare a human victim, plunging a dagger into his chest; by observing the way his limbs convulse as he falls and the gushing of his blood, they are able to read the future."
Writing :

"For beauty is nothing but

the beginning of terror, that we are still able to bear,

and we revere it so, because it calmly disdains

to destroy us."


take a deep breath... do not breath out... count to ten in your head... still holding your breath get a glass of water... do not breath out... take a drink of water... do not breath out... swallow... do not breath out... think of nothing... breath out... your hiccups are gone =) 

1 comment:

David said...

love it. very deep